In the past, writers were expected to make their way to a certain set of conventions: “If you have a good relationship, you’re going to write romances,” as writer Sarah Waters put it.
“If the relationship is good, you won’t.”
Today, a new generation of writers are pushing for more open relationships.
In an era when we’re so consumed with social media, it’s tempting to assume that a relationship will be a quick, easy fix.
But the truth is that the process of writing a romantic story can be challenging.
“There’s a lot of anxiety around being able to write romance stories,” says writer Rebecca Trautwein.
“You have to know yourself a little bit better, to be able to say yes or no.”
You have to work through that anxiety and worry before you begin.
But Trautwetter isn’t worried about having a bad relationship: “I know I don’t have a bad one, but I do have a lot going on.”
The first thing you need is a place to write Your relationship can be a challenging one.
So many people have a story, and they may or may not have an interest in the person in question.
You may find yourself wanting to pursue an interest that is more “romantic” than your current relationship, or a relationship that is already in place.
You don’t want to write a romance that’s not a romance at all.
If you’re unsure if your current partner is romantically interested, you may need to get a better understanding of your partner’s relationship.
It can be hard to start a romance because of the expectations that are in place for new romances.
You have so much control over the relationship, so you have to be willing to be accountable for how you’re putting yourself out there.
In the end, Trautwiin says, “you’re just going to have to write as much as you can and be yourself.”
You’ll need to be aware of your own expectations and be willing for yourself to be more adventurous in how you approach a relationship.
You need to remember that you don’t necessarily need to start with a happy ending.
You just have to make a few adjustments.
You might need to put your relationship on hold, because you’ve got a new friend or you’re in the midst of a relationship breakup.
You can also work on getting over that initial anxiety you have that you’ll never get back.
You’ll be more prepared to explore new relationships in the future.
It’s important to remember: the process isn’t the end of the journey.
You are a writer.
You’re human, and you can learn from others.
So, what are your tips for getting started writing a romance?
Find a place that’s comfortable.
Find somewhere you can be yourself and write a story.
It may be a bedroom, a coffee shop, or an office.
Your writing partner will have to read your script first.
If it’s a script they enjoy, it can be more comfortable.
When you’re writing in your living room, it’ll be much easier to work with the script’s tone.
You will have more control of your script, and the story will be less about you and your relationship.
“When you’re making a story,” says Trautwedein, “there’s a little more to it.
You know that it’s about you, but there’s also the world that’s interested in you, and there’s a whole bunch of stuff that’s happening around you.”
It’s also important to acknowledge that your relationship isn’t going to end, that it will continue.
Your relationship will just take longer to develop and grow, and it’s important for you to let that happen.
“I think it’s okay to be happy with your writing,” says J.J. Abrams, who has been married for more than two decades and has written and directed several romances, including The Truman Show.
“It’s not what it’s meant to be.
You gotta make that decision to go out and make that change, and have a really good, good time with your friends.”
Have a plan.
If your relationship doesn’t work out, you need a plan for what’s next.
You could start a new romance.
You’ve got your own life and your own priorities.
But if you don, you can always look to your writing partner for inspiration.
“They can look at the scripts that are written by other people, and go, ‘Oh, this is what I’ve written,'” says Trauts.
“And it might be something you’re interested in doing.”
If you feel you don